Time for a shift in direction.
I had a pretty good idea of where I wanted a fourth album to go. With the first track, I packed everything I love into it. An ambient intro, a loud bombastic overdriven climax, strings, reversed guitar. It was exactly what I wanted album four to be. There wasn’t a clear thematic idea, but what I wanted the music to sound like was - for the most part - in place.
And then I got sick.
For nearly a week, I was battered with a splitting headache, a constant cough, and aches and chills that seemed like they would never come to an end.
With the exception of still going to work, I spent every other hour of that week in bed mostly sleeping but watching TV on the few exceptions I was conscious.
Between the coverage of the Olympics and the movies I can only half remember now, I was thinking.
Thinking a lot.
Sickness is always a good reminder about my mortality. The human body is a fragile thing and it can start breaking down in an instant without warning. One day you’re perfectly healthy and the next you’re lying helpless in bed.
I thought about where I was currently at in life and the effort - or lack thereof - that I put into it all. The countless things that I put off, ignore, and am not upfront with others about. My mind was especially flooded with the numerous activities I’m completely disinterested in and yet still continue to waste my time with anyway.
Activities and behaviors that at my age, I would like to have put away by now.
I was reminded of this verse from 1 Corinthians 13:
"When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me."
It was a slow process that took about a year, but it finally hit me when I was sick.
There are certain things from being a child that it’s time to let go of such as certain ways I think and activities that at one time interested me, but I now find to be wasteful, devoid of substance.
Moving forward. That’s what I’m trying to say. I couldn’t be happier that I am finally ready to do so.
The last piece of music (and the similar pieces I was working on) lacked an overall theme, some sort of idea that ties it all together and gives the music meaning.
Meaning for me at least.
The strongest music that I’ve written has a cohesive idea to it. Album 3 didn’t have this and that’s why it’s my least favorite collection I’ve put out.
All that being said, this new piece does have an idea behind it.
I wrote the guitar part on my last day of being sick. The piano part was written a little over a week later. All while dwelling on what I've written about above.
I’ve decided to put away the loud guitar, the ambient pads, and the electronic bleeps and bloops. For now, at least. I’m pursuing something that sounds a bit more organic, more natural.
The theme of this music (and the music to come) is simple:
It’s knowing you have to leave when there is a small part of you that would much rather stay.
The single can be downloaded at www.projectatlantic.bandcamp.com or by clicking the "Music" link at the top of this page.
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